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Florida Cops: Man’s Daring Move to Hide Ammo Behind His Balls

Michael Keanu Brennen mugshot by Florida cops

Florida Cops recently revealed a man's daring Move to Hide Ammo Behind His Balls. Oh, it's a story that will make you wonder, "Why would anyone think to hide a bullet beneath their testicles?" Well, let me introduce you to Michael Keanu Brennen, the mastermind behind this comically misguided plan.

According to the Smoking Gun, It all started when Brennen decided to embark on a luxurious 17-night vacation in Indian Rocks Beach. Now, I don't know about you, but if I'm going to enjoy a seaside getaway, I'd rather not have my accommodations funded by stolen credit card information. But hey, to each their own, right?

Florida cops caught this idiot  red-handed at his vacation rental, surrounded by a treasure trove of fake identities.

We're talking driver's licenses, checks, social security cards, credit cards—the whole shebang. But the real kicker came during the booking process at the jailhouse. As the officers kindly reminded Brennen of the consequences of smuggling contraband, he claimed he was as clean as a whistle. Unfortunately for him, his luck had run out.

It turns out he had a surprise waiting down below—a live bullet nestled comfortably beneath his testicles.
I can only imagine the look on the deputy's face as he made this peculiar discovery. "Yep, that's a bullet under your balls, sir. Can't say I've seen that one before."

Of course, Brennen's ingenious plan earned him an additional felony charge for smuggling contraband into a detention facility. But hey, at least the bullet hadn't been fired yet, right? I guess you could say his plan had... a certain explosive potential.

In the end, Brennen managed to secure his freedom by posting a hefty bond. But I have a feeling this won't be the last we hear of him. With his knack for creative criminality, Florida cops will have him back in the headlines sooner rather than later.

You Aren’t A True Floridian Until You’ve Done These 9 Things

Were you born and raised here in the good ol’ state of Florida? Or at least lived here for 20 years? Well, if that’s the case then you are a true Floridian and you’ve definitely done all these nine things listed below! If you thought visiting the capital was on this list, keep thinking. Visiting Tallahassee is not on the list of things that make you a true Floridian. Fort Myers? Maybe.

What truly makes you a Floridian is going through some dumb, slightly serious, yet dangerous life experiences. A good example of that would be hunkering down for a category 1-2 hurricane instead of evacuating and seeing an alligator in the wild. This list doesn’t include visiting an amusement park like Disney World or Universal Studios. This list is full of true silly things us Floridians have done and experienced while living here. Scroll down below to see the entire list!

Why Move To Florida and become a True Floridian?

First and foremost, Florida is home to stunning beaches. There’s over 1,350 miles of coastline with pristine white sand, turquoise water, and extremely hot weather. One of the most famous places is Miami Beach to the very glamorous South Beach each one is amazing in it’s own way. The Gulf Coast beaches like Clearwater and Siesta Key are just as beautiful. It doesn’t matter what you’re looking for, there is a perfect beach for everyone. Visitors can enjoy different water activities like snorkeling, jet skiing, or just tanning in the hot sun.

Tampa ranks #2 on the list of Florida family vacations! Out of 400 towns in Florida they looked at hotel prices, number of restaurants, certain attractions including watersport and amusement parks. Florida is undeniably one of the best vacation destinations in the entire world. There’s tons of reasons why Florida continues to attract millions of visitors every year. From its stunning beaches, vibrant cities and diverse wildlife there’s always something fun to do. They have thrilling theme parks and offer a wide range of attractions for anyone’s travel interests and preferences. Scroll down to see all nine things that make you a true Floridian.

1. Hurricane Party

If you’ve lived in Florida long you know we deal with hurricane season every year. Some people are extra prepared for it to begin and most of us just wing it! As a matter of fact, depending on the category we either host a hurricane party or go to one we’ve been invited to by our friends. We most likely know we’ll lose power so bring a flash light, a 12 pack and lets party!

2. Seeing Alligator In The Wild

Alligator are everywhere in Florida and like to hide in retention ponds or even golf courses. Your chances of seeing one in the wild are pretty high! Alligators are known for their aggressive behavior and there’s been many encounters with humans in the new recently. Gators will most likely attack when they feel threatened. If you live in the state of Florida it’s important to understand their behavior and take necessary precautions to stay safe especially in alligator infested lakes.

3. Waffle House After The Club

It doesn’t have to be after the club necessarily, it could be a night out drinking. But a main staple here in Florida is to hit up a Waffle House early in the morning or if you’re dealing with a horrible hangover.

4. Catching Lizards

If there’s one thing we have it’s an abundance of lizards everywhere! They’re always running around and when it’s mating season you see them stick out their red throats looking for love. One thing we always did as kids was catching the lizards and then we would wear them as earrings. We’d gently open their mouths and have them hang off our finger or ear.

5. Ordering Publix Sub

This isn’t even a question. If you grew up in Florida you have a favorite Pub sub. Even though they’re all delicious it’s a must to eat one every month. They’re the best!

6. Shooting Guns

Whether you’re going to the gun range or practicing outside Florida is known for their guns. If you’ve lived here for a while most likely you’ve had some target practice.

7. Stuck In Disney I-4 Traffic

Whether you’re driving to Disney, Universal or Sea World you will 100% get caught in I-4 traffic. It doesn’t matter the time of day or night because there’s so many Florida visitors that have no idea where they’re driving. Always give yourself extra time when driving through or to Orlando.

8. Scary Weather Turns Beautiful In Minutes

It could look like a tropical storm outside especially in Summer but wait 5 minutes and it’ll be gone! You might not believe me. If you’re a true Floridian you’ve seen this happen more times than not.

9. ZigZag Run From Gators

When living in Florida you might learn about a lot of myths and one big one is the Zigzag run. Growing up you always hear that if an alligator runs at you, you should run in a zigzag pattern. This will help you avoid getting caught because they can’t follow you. FALSE! In fact, alligators can reach speeds of 25 mph, so you need to run as fast as you can, away from an alligator in a straight line if possible.

BudmanWriter
Meet Budman, dynamic host of Marconi Award winning radio station WXKB's WiLD Bunch Morning Show, on B1039. Budman likes to write about funny news, a good Florida man story, stupid criminals or anything involving a superhero. Budman, a comic book and pop culture enthusiast, even named his daughter Kara Zor-El, after Supergirl. His only child is his true passion beyond the mic. Being a dad is his favorite role. Budman, a true family man, balances his love for radio with quality time spent with loved ones and his trusty dogs.